We Had A Dream…….Once

 

We had a dream once – as a nation – we dreamed of freedom, we dreamed of shaking off the yoke of tyranny and oppression.

We dreamed that we could lift our heads up, reclaim our heritage and step forward into the future as a sovereign nation of equals.

On 24th April 1916 a declaration was made on the steps of the GPO in Dublin – it was addressed: To Irishmen and Irishwomen, and it spoke of our aspirations, of our heartfelt wish to be free.

“We declare the right of the people of Ireland to the ownership of Ireland, and to the unfettered control of Irish destinies, to be sovereign and indefeasible. The long usurpation of that right by a foreign people and government has not extinguished the right, nor can it ever be extinguished except by the destruction of the Irish people. In every generation the Irish people have asserted their right to national freedom and sovereignty; six times during the last three hundred years they have asserted it to arms. Standing on that fundamental right and again asserting it in arms in the face of the world, we hereby proclaim the Irish Republic as a Sovereign Independent State, and we pledge our lives and the lives of our comrades-in-arms to the cause of its freedom, of its welfare, and of its exaltation among the nations.” [1]

(emphasis added)

Today almost 100 years later that dream lies in ruins, we do not control our own destiny, we are not free, and our people are suffering, our young people are leaving, creating not just an impending demographic crisis, but a State where the pool of “taxpayers” is far too small to sustain even the most basic level of services. We are getting a taste of what that is like right now as we speak – but – it will get worse. Unless we change it.

“Youth organisations in Ireland are warning that the number of young people emigrating could be devastating for the country’s economy.

On Wednesday, they will meet politicians in Dublin to demand that more is done to tackle the problem.

Around 300,000 people have left the Republic of Ireland since 2009 – many of them young and looking for work – and tens of thousands more say they are also likely to leave unless the economy starts to improve.” [2]

Because that’s all we are now, taxpayers – not citizens, not human beings – TAXPAYERS – merely a means to an end – and the end is to keep the coffers of the rich and the privileged filling up.

EMIGRATION is tearing families apart and creating a new generation of lonely older people in Ireland, a charity has claimed.

Irish charity ALONE says it has seen an increase in the number of older people at an all-time low as a direct result of their children and grandchildren emigrating.

The charity’s claims follow news last week that a record number of Irish workers under 35 are set to move to Canada after more than 10,000 Canadian visas were made available this year.

ALONE CEO Sean Moynihan said: “We have even received calls from the emigrants themselves asking us to check on their older relative.

“The children and grandchildren of Ireland’s older people are emigrating in droves, leaving behind a large huge increase in the number of older people requiring our services because their support systems have disappeared.”

EU figures show Ireland now has the highest level of emigration in Europe.

The latest Central Statistics Office figures show almost 250 people leave the country daily – one person every six minutes.” [3]

We will become a grey nation, and how will we treat our elderly citizens, those who cannot just up and leave? Well, we already have a pretty good idea of how this State already treats our elderly citizens. Our elderly people are forced to lie on hospital trollies for hours, awaiting treatment.

“You see my mother has been lying on a trolley since Wednesday morning and as I write this on Thursday afternoon, she is still there.

She’s not alone, there are dozens of others who’ve been waiting even longer.

Lourdes is a hospital from hell but don’t blame the staff. How they cope with what is a never-ending crisis is beyond belief.

But they do and because they do, the scoundrels who have failed to end this misery will allow it to continue.

Maggie Flanagan will be 94 next September and is paralysed on her left side following a stroke last year.

She led an exemplary life and raised five children alone. The youngest was just three when my father died in 1964.

She never drank nor smoked and was forced to go out to work to keep us alive and to get us through school. She was the model citizen who certainly did the State some service.

Now this great Republic can’t provide her with a hospital bed.

Maggie was brought to the Lourdes from St Mary’s nursing home suffering from pneumonia and the antibiotics were having little effect.

She is now lying on a trolley less than one metre away from a woman who is constantly coughing up phlegm.

Yes, we Irish certainly know how to look after our old folk.” [4]

Our water is and has been for many years undrinkable [5] in some parts of the State, never mind that in fact we don’t even own our own water anymore.

“During 2013 There were 57 Boil water notices and 12 Water restriction notices active in 16 Counties affecting 35,831 people. By comparison, in 2012 suppliers issued 42 Boil water notices and water restrictions affecting approximately 50,000 consumers. By The end of 2013, 19 Boil Notices and 8 Water Restriction Notices In 12 Counties remained in place affecting over 17,000 people. Notices can apply to all or part of a supply and last from several days to several years depending on the scale of works necessary to solve the issue.

In some cases notices are precautionary in nature due to inadequate treatment or failure of the disinfection system, whereas in other cases notices are put in place because E. Coli or Cryptosporidium Is detected. Also, several of the water restrictions relate to the presence of lead pipes.

Appendix 5 Provides a list of the notices in place during 2013. As Of 11 December 2014, There were 23 supplies on Boil Water Notices Affecting a population of 23,297 And 15 Supplies on Water Restrictions Affecting a population of 4,071. The Majority of the population affected by these current boil water notices are in County Roscommon and they relate to Cryptosporidium risk.” [5]

We have a housing crisis in the midst of a glut of housing lying mouldering in unfinished estates littering this land, we have children going to school hungry, and young men in crisis, in despair take their own lives rather than face another day. We have bankers awarding themselves massive bonuses while a soup kitchen – a SOUP kitchen in Sligo is forced to close. [6]

We have lurched from one crisis to another, we have watched in horror as tales of abuse and maltreatment of our most vulnerable citizens have been told, we have seen with our own eyes as corruption and malfeasance in the highest levels of government has gone unpunished, in fact we have seen the architects of our destruction awarded, been given yet more opportunities to destroy this country.

On that April day in 1916, a startling declaration (for that time) was made – we pledged allegiance to an as yet unarticulated concept – a concept that would take another 40 or so years to find purchase in the wider world – the concept of Universal Human Rights.

“The Irish Republic is entitled to, and hereby claims, the allegiance of every Irishman and Irishwoman. The Republic guarantees religious and civil liberty, equal rights and equal opportunities to all its citizens, and declares its resolve to pursue the happiness and prosperity of the whole nation and all of its parts, cherishing all of the children of the nation equally……..”

It would be 50 years before another martyr on the altar of Human Rights also declared – I Have a Dream. Dr. Martin Luther King said to the American people, and it resonates today for us.

“I say to you today, my friends, even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident; that all men are created equal.” [7]

100 years ago WE had that dream – that dream has become a nightmare.

Next year in 2016 we will have an opportunity to remind ourselves of the dream our forefathers and mothers had – a nation, free of tyranny, a nation that cherishes its citizens, ALL its citizens, a nation that can hold its head up and face into the future bowed but not beaten, hopeful not hopeless, willing to put aside petty differences and ancient rivalries and embrace once more that dream.

We have been betrayed, we have been lied to, we have been almost brought to the brink of destruction by those whom we trusted, those whom we should have been able to depend on to steer us through the oft times turbulent waters of our history. Now, we the people are being forced to pay the debts of those who caused that destruction, who brought this calamity upon us – we are paying with our young people, we are paying with our tears, we are paying for the privilege of being crushed, being impoverished, made homeless, driven to despair and hopelessness.

If we could but embrace that dream again – a dream of a nation where all its citizens are valued, where that declaration that acknowledged the fundamental tenets of Universal Human Rights – that all Human beings have intrinsic worth and value – that the only requirement to be vested with Human Rights is to be a Human Being.

We’re not just taxpayers, we’re not just faceless economic units, we are Human Beings, we are Irish citizens. We’re not a faceless multitude of “burdens on the State” – we ARE the State – WE are The Republic of Ireland

Our worth as Human Beings is not dependant on whether or not we are toiling away to pay off debts we did not incur, to fund the lifestyles and cynical ambitions of corporations and greedy developers, to line the already bulging pockets of avaricious businessmen.

Being poor is not a character flaw – being rich on the backs of the poor IS. The late great Nelson Mandela said:

“Over coming poverty is not a gesture of charity. It is an act of justice it is the protection of fundamental human rights. Everyone everywhere has the right to live in dignity. Free from fear and oppression. Free from hunger and thirst and free to express themselves and associate at will” Nelson Mandela [8]

We had a dream once – we had hope, we had a future, our children had a future and we were willing to fight for that future – our future has now been mortgaged – our children’s futures have been sold.

The resources to fund our services were signed away in order to satisfy an agreement made in the dead of a cold September night in 2008 to save the skins of crooks and gombeen men.

But – we have as a nation survived much worse – we have endured – we are still here – our people have gone out in the world and done extraordinary things – we refuse to give up.

We will not give up – we cannot give up – we have a destiny to fulfil, almost 100 years ago we had a dream, the time has come to make that dream a reality, to build a nation that;

“……guarantees religious and civil liberty, equal rights and equal opportunities to all its citizens, and declares its resolve to pursue the happiness and prosperity of the whole nation and all of its parts, cherishing all of the children of the nation equally……..”

In our national anthem [9] the last line of the 1st chorus – in English says

“we’re children of a fighting race, that never yet has known disgrace, and as we march the foe to face, we’ll sing a soldiers song”

The foe we face is among us, the enemy is inside our gates – 100 years after we articulated our dream of being free we will have an opportunity to reclaim that dream, to start again, to fulfil our destiny.

My fellow Irish men and Irish women, and all those who call this land home, in the words of Dr. Rory Hearne from NUI Maynooth;

“A century after rising up and (partly) freeing itself from hundreds of years of colonization and associated enforced famine and oppression, Ireland has once again become a colonised state. Its sovereignty and the dignity of its people, its natural resources and public assets having being handed over to financial and corporate capital (big business) by the Irish political establishment and management classes.

From Irish water, publicly owned land, to the Corrib gas field in Mayo, our fisheries, our wind, motorways, housing, welfare job supports, community services, public transport, health services – they are all already, or are in the process of, being privatised and sold off to the control and ownership of private corporations and their wealthy owners. The most grievous forms of re-colonisation and abandonment of the principles of the Republic took place when the Irish people bailed out domestic banks, developers and the European financial system.

As a result, the people suffered massive austerity and the national debt has reached the point whereby a fifth of all tax revenues are now paying debt repayments rather than much needed public services. People are being evicted from their homes and made homeless or suffering from exorbitant rent and mortgage repayments in order to satisfy the profit seeking of the banks (including state owned AIB), and this is being worsened as NAMA and the government enable international property vulture investment funds to buy up swathes of Irish homes and land, irrespective of the short and long term social impacts. The Euro financial system and associated treaties such as the Fiscal Treaty have removed much of Ireland’s sovereignty.

For example, Ireland is restricted in its ability to borrow or increase investment in vital public services and infrastructure because of EU Treaty and Euro financial rules. Germany and the core European countries are dictating the imposition of austerity across all countries.

How is Ireland still a sovereign, independent, country in this context? How can the will of the Irish people be expressed and translated into practice through their democratically elected government? In a way, Ireland has become a neo-colony of neoliberal capitalism, US multinationals and the EU.” [10]

Dr. Martin Luther King articulated the only answer possible for both us and any nation that finds itself crushed under the heels of faceless bureaucrats, corporate bullies and sycophantic politicians.

“I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed:

“We hold these truths to be self-evident; that all men are created equal.”

We must once more become “a risen people” and throw off this new yoke of oppression and tyranny and throw out those who enabled it.

From Bunreacht na hEireann 1937 (Constitution of Ireland)

Article 6

All powers of government, legislative, executive and judicial, derive, under God, from the people, whose right it is to designate the rulers of the State and, in final appeal, to decide all questions of national policy, according to the requirements of the common good.”

(emphasis added)

It is time. It is way past time we took back what was taken from us – squandered, given away, sold – “ownership of Ireland, and [to] the unfettered control of Irish destinies

 

 

References

[1]Poblacht Na hEireann

http://www.irishfreedomcommittee.net/HISTORY/1916_Proc.htm

[2] Irish youth groups warn of emigration crisis 29 May 2013

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-22698740

[3] Ireland’s new ‘lonely’ generation as emigration increases By Siobhan Breatnach on March 25, 2014

http://www.irishpost.co.uk/news/irelands-new-lonely-generation-one-person-leaves-ireland-every-six-minutes

[4] Pat Flanagan: Kenny’s response to our A&E shambles is truly sick

http://www.irishmirror.ie/news/news-opinion/pat-flanagan-kennys-response-ae-5241354

[5] From the EPA (Environmental Protection Agency) Drinking Water Report 2013

http://www.epa.ie/pubs/reports/water/drinking/Drinking%20Water%20Report%20Web.pdf

[6] Soup kitchen in Sligo forced to close over toilet red-tape; Tuesday, December 16, 2014

http://www.irishexaminer.com/ireland/soup-kitchen-in-sligo-forced-to-close-over-toilet-red-tape-302677.html

[7] I have A Dream – Dr. Martin Luther King.

http://www.let.rug.nl/usa/documents/1951-/martin-luther-kings-i-have-a-dream-speech-august-28-1963.php

[8] Nelson Mandela – make poverty history.

http://www.makepovertyhistory.org/extras/mandela.shtml

[9] National Anthem – Abhrán na bhfiann/A Soldiers Song

http://www.irish-folk-songs.com/irish-national-anthem-lyrics-chords-and-sheet-music.html

[10] The Irish water war, austerity and the ‘Risen people’; An analysis of participant opinions, social and political impacts and transformative potential of the Irish anti water-charges movement; Dr Rory Hearne, Department of Geography, Maynooth University, April 2015

https://www.maynoothuniversity.ie/sites/default/files/assets/document/TheIrishWaterwar_0.pdf

There Is a Disturbance In The Force…….

 

Yeah, yeah I know, more sci-fi (ish) metaphors – what can I say, am a sucker for sci-fi (ish) films. As a reflection of, and metaphor for societal mores and “norms” films act as a sort of filter through which those mores and “norms” become embedded in the zeitgeist – doncha think?

Someone mentioned the Joss Whedon film Serenity a few weeks ago on a comment stream – for the life of me I cannot remember where I read it – anyhoo – one of my personal favourites as well, especially the theme of an all powerful authoritarian system literally with the power to invade your mind.

Classic scene where River (as a child) is being lectured by a sanctimonious teacher about how the “outer planets” refused to accept the social conditioning of the all powerful alliance – for their own good – now where have we heard that justification before.

In other words those who reject this social conditioning are nothing but savages and barbarians – or words to that effect.

The title of this piece though, pertains to something related but parallel, the undermining of the prevailing ethos within and through the societal glue that holds that society together.

An unchallenged (till now) allegiance to a femalecentric worldview controlled and disseminated by the official spokespersons of modern gynocentrism – feminists.

No-one can now dispute that ALL “theories” emanating from feminists and various acolytes of academic feminism are complete and utter bullshit, fraudulent, phoney, lies and deception.

These are facts, and they are not in dispute by anyone with half a brain.

The question to be asked though is this – the underlying driving force behind modern feminism and all manifestations of a female centric worldview is and has been gynocentrism. Whither to now for feminism?

Aha! Whither to indeed? Why back to the drawing board – to the source – for inspiration, for a new and shiner template upon which to write the outline for the next manifestation of gynocentrism. A caring sharing warm cuddly gynocentrism, a nice gynocentrism – with a large dollop of………………….”it’s for your own good” as seasoning.

Because who could argue with a sincerely expressed motive that all you are offering is a template to follow that will be “for your own good” hmmmmm

I came across these two words juxtaposed next to one another some months ago – and decided to wait to see how this latest salvo would be received.

Freedom feminism.

I shall never need to hunt for another example of a perfect oxymoron than these two words placed together to form a whole.

Main driver behind this new and improved and shiny feminism is Christina Hoff Sommers. Have always been in two minds about Hoff Sommers, she has done some good work in the area of men’s and boy’s rights – and to be fair, has taken some quite accurate pot-shots at “gender feminism” but – there was a point about a year ago when it was time to “chose a side” or rather, to shit or get off the pot.

She chose to attempt to repackage feminism, airbrush away its toxic roots, sidestep its inherently flawed premise and inexplicably try to rewrite history – or what passes for history – feminist style.

It’s what my mother would describe as “wanting jam on both sides of your bread

Hoff Sommers is relying on something to give this new shiny improved feminism purchase into the zeitgeist – a willingness on the part of societies at large to continue to endorse a gynocentric world view of…………………everything, in effect the theory goes – if it’s good for women, then it’s good for men, ergo the emphasis should always be on what’s good for women, and making men become what’s good for women – again. Just not in that nasty, shreiky, gender feminist, all men are patriarchial bastards kind of way. Nosireebob – in a nice, “it’s for your own good” kind of way. Sigh.

Hence the title of this piece – there is indeed a disturbance in the force – a singular lack of willingness on the parts of a great many people, both male and female to subscribe to, endorse or give tacit or implicit approval to a continuing female centric world view.

Without that willingness, gynocentrism withers and dies, without gynocentrism any manifestation of feminism will fail – will become subject to the derision and disdain that all crackpot ideas or “theories” deserve. Freedom feminism is one of those – hence why I couldn’t actually be bothered giving it any more attention. Bit like spotting some roadkill at the side of the road as you drive past – depends on the state of it, if you go – eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuw as you glance at it.

I was asked recently “just how old is gynocentrism? And was it always a bad thing?”

Actually – gynocentrism is very old – and was not necessarily always a bad thing – it developed out of a need to protect and provide for one’s “mate” during our human history when life was an exercise in survival. Though one couldn’t actually call this form of human interaction true gynocentrism.

To illustrate just how old this particular way of seeing male/female relationships is, the quote below is from an ancient Egyptian text called The Instruction of Ptah-Hotep.

“……..Instruction of Ptah-hotep in its entirety, divided into sections by red writing, as aforesaid.[7] In this, also, we get a definite date, for we learn in the opening lines that its author (or compiler) lived in the reign of King Isôsi. Now Isôsi was the last ruler but one of the Fifth Dynasty, and ruled forty-four years, from about 3580 to 3536 B.C. Thus we may take about 3550 as the period of Ptah-hotep.

(emphasis added)

What this quote below also illustrates is something very important – how women were viewed in ancient Egypt – as persons to be treasured and cherished – not a hint of oppression to be found. Damn!

“21. If thou wouldest be wise, provide for thine house, and love thy wife that is in thine arms. Fill her stomach, clothe her back; oil is the remedy of her limbs. Gladden her heart during thy lifetime, for she is an estate profitable unto its lord. Be not harsh, for gentleness mastereth her more than strength. Give (?) to her that for which she sigheth and that toward which her {51} eye looketh; so shalt thou keep her in thine house…. “

The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Instruction of Ptah-Hotep and the Instruction of Ke’Gemni, by Battiscombe G. Gunn

http://www.gutenberg.org/files/30508/30508-h/30508-h.htm

As an Irish person I can trace back some of my “traditions” to the Iron age – so it does amuse me when I read either positive or negative commentary from feminists/gynocentrists regarding “traditional” practices – usually referred to as “traditional gender roles” with “traditional” marriage practices being either lauded or denigrated.

The period of “history” generally used to illustrate the “historical oppression of women” by the dumbest of the dumbest feminists are the 1950’s – because apparently the 1950’s was a really really really long time ago!

Did you know that the phrase “tying the knot” actually originates from one form of marriage practiced in Ireland called “hand-fasting” – this form of marriage (yes, we had several different forms of marriage) – was only designed to last for a year and a day – after that time expired, one could renew it or not – if not, both parties went their separate ways with no-one owing anybody anything. It was very civilised – it was a contract – between equals – as were most forms of marriage in ancient Hibernia (Ireland)

Pure Gynocentrism evolved in feudal societies and had its roots in a warped form of chivalry – the place to go for a thorough grounding in this is Peter Wrights site Gynocentrism and its Cultural Origins

Link here http://gynocentrism.com/

This form of a warped chivalry (gynocentrism) lies at the heart of all manifestations of feminism. A demand for special status to be afforded to women because they are women. There is a complex interplay between echoes of an ancient urge to protect and provide, that early gynocentrists harnessed and various “waves” of feminists hijacked – till it eventually evolved into the toxic ideology we have today.

The paradox is that feminism demands “equality” by invoking that ancient “oppressive” urge to protect and provide for women because they are “vulnerable fragile creatures who need special treatment” institutionalised toxic chivalry (gynocentrism) masquerading as “equality”

Now don’t get me wrong – feminism is deeply embedded into the political and intuitional structures of almost all frameworks of our societies and cultures and they (feminists) will fight tooth and nail to resist being excised from there. In fact that battle is already ongoing.

But this is the 21st century – the rules of engagement have changed utterly – whereas previously, during times of social and cultural shifts, the mores and norms of a society or culture were imposed from the top down. Now?

Ah yes – now – the power to influence society and culture at large now rests……………….within society and culture.

Put rather simplistically – who controls the flow of information?

Answer – Nobody. Everybody. Actually the only way to regain control of the flow of information now would be to shut down the internet – permanently. Would be to erase from the billions of individual personal computers spread all over the world every single piece of information that has been disseminated from the time when one individual sent another individual………..anything.

That’s an awful lot of free-flowing information to track down and destroy – wouldn’t you say?

There are also two other things that you would need to unravel and suppress – the much trumpeted dedication to “democracy” and “Human Rights” that ALL western governments take enormous pains to claim as their raison de etre.

Over the last 6 decades or so, there has been an almost comical pissing contest among western nations to outdo one another in the “most democratic” and “best Human Rights record” contest.

Again granted – the proof of the pudding is in the eating, and there are visible and concrete examples abounding of the lack of democracy, the pathetic Human Rights records of very many western states.

But – the fact is – those Human Rights instruments EXIST – those claims are on record – and there are very few people with access to the internet who cannot with a click of a mouse sit and read in the comfort of their own homes, a concise and detailed account of their personal – HUMAN RIGHTS.

100 years ago – the average person wouldn’t have had a clue what rights they did or didn’t have – wouldn’t perhaps even believe that they had rights.

Today? Please – I hear it all the time – it gets monotonous – “I know my rights

Generally this is a rather self-absorbed declaration because it rarely takes into account this – “do you know everybody else has the exact same rights?”

Feminists and gynocentrists are typical of the first example – they “know their rights” as they should – they clawed out most of those extra rights by depriving others (men and boys) of theirs. Nearly. By playing the poor fragile wittle woman card.

But – the fact of the matter is this – even the most ignorant twat or arsehole has a very definite belief that they “have rights”

One does not have to be a genius to discern from even the most juvenile and poorly written feminist screed that the over-riding theme is a direct assault on the notion that men and boys have rights.

Feminism is a rights stripping narrative wrapped up in hysterical rhetoric about…..all kinds of trivial bullshit that has “upset” or “pissed off” or “offended” some whiney irrational and petulant female.

Acknowledging that men and boys have rights would dissipate and render null and void the idea that all attention and focus should be on – women’s rights. It would literally deprive women of that thing they crave above all other things – being the absolute centre of attention by…………………….everybody.

Like I said – everybody knows or believes that they “have rights” everybody is aware that the last 6 decades or so have been the era of “rights” so when insane feminists keep shrieking about “women’s rights” and claiming that women don’t have rights to this that or the other – even the most ignorant of persons is going to look at these claims and think “what the fuck is that fool talking about”

How much more could you possible want?

Here is where it gets just a tad complicated – the belief is/was that “everybody has rights” even among men – until they come to test that premise – then they discover something.

Those rights they believed they had – they get violated, trampled on, brushed aside – in favour of enhancing the extra rights of some female.

The knowledge that this has been happening over and over again in all these self-congratulatory “democracies” at the behest of feminists is now saturating the zeitgeist through the power of the internet to disseminate information directly to millions of people – without interference from anybody.

As Mr. Universe in the film Serenity says “you can’t stop the signal”

Hence why there is a disturbance in the force – the force being the power of feminism to dictate the narrative, to set the terms of what is or isn’t true – about anything. To control the flow of information.

There is a terrible sickness in a government that lauds and congratulates itself on its Human Rights record while actively endorsing, encouraging and supporting blatant abuses of Human Rights – against men and boys.

That blindly and with wilful ignorance gives credence to the bigoted, biased and fraudulent “research” being shoved at it by vicious malign and toxic feminists designed to strip rights from men and boys. Designed to prevent even the conversation taking place about Human Rights abuses being perpetrated against men and boys. Hence why the shrieking, caterwauling and hysterics are growing in volume and intensity from feminists – all in an effort to drown out the voices of men and boys.

The question for these governments is – has it ever occurred to you to take the societal temperature – to take your heads out of your over-fed arses and listen to what is being said outside your golden privileged elite circle? To ignore the nutcase feminists, the screams of outrage, the tantrums and hysterics and listen to men.

Take IPV/IPA – Intimate Partner Violence and Intimate Partner Abuse.

I’m NOT a feminist so I have no problem saying this – approx 20% – 23% of all relationships have aspects of IPV/IPA.

Within that relatively small cohort of relationships – approx 40% of “violence/abuse” is mutual – meaning both parties are as bad as one another.

The rest of the violence/abuse is more or less evenly distributed between male and female perpetrators – meaning that approx half those violent abusive arseholes are male and approx half are female. Which means that approx half the victims of uni-directional violence are male and approx half are female.

The causes of that violence are myriad and complex – and have sod all to do with patriarchy or any other stupid and ridiculous feminist non “theory” but everything to do with, socio-economic factors, drug/alcohol abuse, mental health issues, childhood experiences of family violence etc to name but a few of the more prevalent “causes”.

All of those factors impact upon both men and women.

There is no such thing as “gender based violence” and to continue to believe and endorse this rubbish is to fail to actually address the causes and TOTAL victims of IPV/IPA.

Have I deliberately and callously ignored female victims of IPV/IPA? No – I bloody haven’t – I have quite clearly acknowledged that approx half of victims are female.

Because – I’m NOT a feminist – ergo – I have no need to lie or dissemble or fraudulently try to airbrush ANY victim OF ANYTHING out of the picture in order to advocate for excessive amounts of funding to line the pockets of poisonous malign ideologues.

To those in power – you seem to believe that unless you endorse these lies peddled to you by feminists that “society” will follow suit and go into hysterics at being told NO.

Newsflash – society will applaud – society will be right behind you – society is WAITING – is begging you to tell these malign bitches to – bugger off!

There is a disturbance in the force – a change in the zeitgeist – NO-ONE – other than insane toxic feminists believes or wants that crap anymore – READ the damn comment section of any article – including the ones peddled by feminists.

You are basing your policy decisions on blackmail from a small toxic network of vicious ideologues – you are making political decisions based on lies, on fraud, on bigotry.

There is a delicate balance that holds most societies and cultures together – more importantly – an even more delicate balance that holds an economy together.

Citizens and the state must interact with one another is a myriad number of ways in order to maintain those balances.

Feminism has and is putting enormous uneven pressure on one side of that societal, cultural and economic scale – the tipping point is drawing closer and closer – that tipping point is the gathering critical mass of a shift in the zeitgeist – a shift in mores and norms that the majority of peoples within those societies and cultures endorse.

There is also nothing more important within healthy functioning societies than the quality and depth of the relationships and kinship groups that individuals are part of.

Feminism has consistently attacked and set out to destroy the delicate strands that hold those relationships together – the relationships that are the glue that keeps societies functioning.

The toxic effects of these attacks are becoming more and more visible – more and more apparent – and people are finally waking up and really seeing the devastation caused by feminism. Ultimately feminism is the ideology of elitists – a superior “class” dictating to the “peasants” and it is fuelled by malice.

“19. If thou desire that thine actions may be good, save thyself from all malice, and beware of the quality of covetousness, which is a grievous inner (?) malady. Let it not chance that thou fall thereinto. It setteth at variance fathers-in-law and the kinsmen of the daughter-in-law; it sundereth the wife and the husband. It gathereth unto itself all evils; it is the girdle of all wickedness.[11] But the man that is just flourisheth; truth goeth in his footsteps, and he maketh habitations therein, not in the dwelling of covetousness.”

The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Instruction of Ptah-Hotep and the Instruction of Ke’Gemni, by Battiscombe G. Gunn

http://www.gutenberg.org/files/30508/30508-h/30508-h.htm

No-one needs feminism to point out or interpret anything for you – all you need, is to be a fully aware Human Being with a conscience. All you need is to recognise that male or female you share this planet with other Human Beings.

All Human Beings suffer – why would anybody need a vicious malign ideologue who hates one half of humanity to tell you that?

Feminism is the belief that human beings not yet born are guilty of crimes not yet committed and are only waiting for these human beings to be born so the punishment can begin.

There Is No Spoon………….

 

Fans of the Matrix films starring Keanu Reeves (Neo), Laurence Fishburne (Morpheus) and Carrie Anne Moss (Trinity) will understand the title of this essay, as will many M(H)RA’s

The Matrix (1999) http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0133093/

On Neo’s first visit to The Oracle he observes some children performing amazing “tricks” one of these children, a young boy is bending a spoon with what appears to be his mind.

Neo is intrigued and wants to know – how?

The young boys answer is “to not to try to bend the spoon but to realise that – there is no spoon”. I’m paraphrasing slightly.

This essay is about perception and reality, about viewing something, anything, through the prism of your subjective experience of it, and the factual reality of it – whatever “it” happens to be.

It is about applying energy, resources and time, not only trying to forcing the spoon to bend, but wishing that spoon into objective reality, rather than realising that…………”there is no spoon”

In other words, this young boy is exerting force – an invisible powerful force to alter something, to bend something into a shape that is not its natural shape. The trick is, he is doing this to something that doesn’t actually exist – there is no spoon – just the illusion of a spoon.

Feminism is like that force, and the spoon represents the object, the thing that this force is wishing into existence, that thing or object being the sum of all evil, the fount of all badness – the big bad patriarchy.

Just like in the film, the only object that actually exists is the boy – the thing he has created is the illusion of a spoon – the trick is not that he can bend this imaginary spoon – the trick, if you will, it is that he can make you believe in that spoons existence.

So. Feminism is – the ability to make you see something that is not there – and to manipulate and bend that thing into any shape.

I can tell you that factually, objectively that in 2004, 6 female persons were unlawfully killed in the Republic of Ireland – those 6 female persons represent a miniscule percentage of the entire female population of The Republic of Ireland in 2004.

What feminists will tell you is the complete opposite of objective factual reality – they will expend much energy, time and effort trying to convince you that not only is objective reality wrong, but that their subjective irrational and erroneous perception of that unreality is correct.

In effect, attempt to convince you that there is a spoon where none exists, and that we need to bend that spoon – or else – calamity.

Feminism isn’t about reality, it is about perception, subjective interpretation, and altering a non existent spoon.

Naturally there are other ways to describe this – making mountains out of molehills, creating problems out of thin air, over-reacting excessively to every single “bad thing” that happens to women. All accurate descriptors of what feminism does.

The thing is – as a result of wishing that spoon into existence (creating a thing called the patriarchy) they have actually managed to create another spoon – a different spoon – that represents a chasm between men and women – a gulf, a poisonous barrier, a wall of distrust, suspicion and anger – lots and lots anger.

This anger feeds and renews and perpetuates the existence of this gulf.

The spoon that feminism claimed to exist never did, but because of the insistence on the existence of that spoon emerged what we now have – a massive almost unbreachable wall between the two halves of humanity. Two halves of humanity so out of tune with one another, so distrustful of one another and so immersed in the distorted reality created by feminism that vast numbers of men and women see one another and themselves in ways that are so unreal as to be unbelievable. Yet – many many believe in these distorted perceptions and refuse to see the reality.

The problem isn’t that anything bad happens to either men or women, because to be blunt bad shit happens, all the time, to everybody – the problem IS accepting the subjective, distorted and misperception of anything bad that happens TO women, BY feminism.

Feminists are telling you that there is this massive horrible thing, this awful spoon of malignancy and evil and badness, that only the force of feminism can bend into whatever shape makes the badness go away – the reality is – feminism IS the badness.

6 females persons were unlawfully killed in The Republic of Ireland in 2004, there have never been more than 22 (approx) female persons unlawfully killed in this State – NEVER – in any year.

These are bad things – no doubt about it – but – these are bad things in isolation from the actual lived reality of the 99.9% or thereabouts of the rest of the female population of The Republic of Ireland – or ever will be the reality.

Any hysteria surrounding these deaths is a manifestation of the flawed, distorted and corrupt perception of feminists and feminism and the toxic cloud of anger, hatred, bitterness and malice that lies at the very core of that perception of subjective experience that feeds that thing called feminism. That feeds it and fuels its existence.

Everything – and I mean everything that feminists say, think, believe and claim – is a spoon – and the reality is.

There is no spoon – there never was a spoon.

Feminism maintains that all bad things are male and all good thing things are female – I personally am becoming concerned that the MHRM is coalescing around yet another erroneous perception, that all bad things are female and all good things are male.

Both perceptions are equally wrong – and that is the only place where I will concede the concept of “equality”

Bad things – are neither male nor female – there is no inherent badness in being either male or female – but – both females and males do bad things – to one another.

There are human beings who are bad – evil – vicious – malicious – corrupt – violent – nasty – cruel. Some of those human beings are female, some of them are male.

The numbers of males and the numbers of females that bad things happen to – is irrelevant. It proves nothing about men, and it proves nothing about women – either in general or in particular.

Yes – you can make certain rough generalisations about men and about women – a fairly broad spectrum of leanings, tendencies, general interests etc – but just because lots of women want to do one thing and lots of men like doing something else – again, it proves nothing about either men or women – nor should it. Nor does it imply or even state that one sex is somehow being disadvantaged by the other.

Feminism takes these broad general commonalities that either women share or men share to a greater or lesser degree and make assumptions – negatively about men and oddly enough negatively about women – and BOTH sexes somewhere along the way decided to accept these distorted assumptions – to give credence to these rather warped and completely subjective perceptions.

It is worth noting at this point – that the vast majority of feminists who peddled these distorted perceptions, these warped subjective “realities” were using their own dysfunctional experiences as the basis for what became feminism – an entire “reality” created out of the personally dysfunctional lives and experiences of a relatively small number of – nutcases.

Not only did these “pioneers” have the mothers of all twisted spoons – they managed to convince not just other women but a huge number of men as well that their personal distorted “reality” was in fact – reality.

Millions of women’s patterned and re-patterned their own experiences, their own realities on the twisted perceptions of these lunatics. Re-interpreted their own realities to fit the illusion.

Now vast numbers of women convince themselves that they are being constantly disadvantaged – even when they have chosen to do whatever it is that allegedly puts them in that disadvantaged position!

I often wonder what the hell kind of fairground mirrors do these stupid women look into to see these distorted images of themselves?

So. In effect – the loons of feminism not only created the spoon, they poured all their malice, all their bitterness, all their rage and hatred for men into that creation.

Feminism is that malice, that bitterness, that rage and hatred, polished and moulded, layered and then re-layered with “credibility” with “academic cachet” with “plausibility”

Where we are now is like the aftermath of a massive bust up between two close friends – instigated by a conniving and sly third party. Feminism is the third party – the Iago dripping poison into the ear of Othello about Desdemona.

Where we are at now is the point where the third party has been revealed – but – things were said – nasty things – things were done – really nasty things – and both sides are understandably bitter.

To all intents and purposes vast numbers of men and women “took sides” and now – well now – we need to ask ourselves – do we keep the feud going, for another generation, and another, and another – knowing the truth – or are we going to stop and realise?

There. Is. No. Spoon.

There never was a spoon – there never was a massive global patriarchal conspiracy – never.

 

Did bad things happen? Yep – did people do bad things? Yep. Some of those people were female and some were male.

Were there some really ridiculous attitudes and beliefs about men and women? Yep. Mostly out of ignorance, stupidity and misinformation.

Did women suffer from discrimination in some areas? Yep – they did – but then – so did men – different kinds and in different ways.

Feminism would have you believe that ALL women experience their realities through a uniquely female prism – and that this distorted prism can only be interpreted, explained, defined and changed through the power of feminist ideology – oh pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease.

I’m female – I can count on the fingers of one hand minus my thumb and little finger the number of times I’ve ever actually thought about being female. I was in the middle of giving birth at the time – and it was accompanied by some choice language.

Feminism will also tell you that only feminists can and have the authority to interpret male reality – also through the prism of feminism.

Again – pluuuuuuuuuuzeeee!

What is feminism? It is the distorted and twisted dysfunctional and irrational perceptions of some seriously disturbed hags made manifest and actual, labelled and named, and brought into being from a toxic cloud of bitterness, hatred and a thirst for revenge on the perceived wrongs done to these individual nutcases and projected outwards onto the entire male population of this planet, both past present and future.

It is an irrational response to an imaginary “threat” an illusion, a chimera, brought into being by malice and bile and vitriol.

THERE. IS. NO. SPOON.

So, if there is and never was this global patriarchal threat to the wellbeing of ALL women, everywhere – what is left?

Malice, bile and vitriol, hated and bitterness.

Here’s the thing – there is nothing bad that exclusively happens ONLY to women – or ONLY to men – both men and women get ill, have accidents, are unfortunate enough to be assaulted, robbed and/or killed.

Both men and women suffer any and all of the possible bad things that can happen to a human being.

To put it bluntly – when shit rains down – men don’t have magic umbrellas that protect them automatically – it rains on everybody – doncha know. Feminism will tell you that rain wets women more than men.

But, for me, what truly encapsulates the sheer depth and breadth of the malice and spite that fuels feminism and feminists is patting yourself on the back for creating something called

The International Day of the Girl Child.

To a certain extent, while I loathe with a passion the whole concept of International Women’s Day, we are actually talking about adult women here – if they want to have a day and talk shoite about “the achievements of women” – whatever – zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

But to deliberately and consciously exclude CHILDREN – to viciously and smugly discard and marginalise CHILDREN as not worth – having a day or being included in a day – on the sole basis that these CHILDREN are boys – to me this is the quintessential essence of what feminism is all about.

Children who have no power, no influence, no voice – children who depend on adults for their safety and well-being – and feminists happily, smugly and with utter contempt exclude the most powerless of all – because they are boy children.

If nothing will ever convince you, persuade you, or cause you to stop and question what feminism is, what its purpose is, what fuels it, what drives it, what its toxic distorted roots are – THIS should.

The reality is – there is no spoon – there was never a spoon – there was never a global patriarchal conspiracy against women – but there sure as fuck is a global matriarchal conspiracy against men and boys – how else can you explain or justify ignoring CHILDREN – because they happen to be boy children?

Stolen childhoods and blighted lives – child abuse in industrial schools

We have an ignoble history, generations of Irish boys and girls endured the horrors of a devils pact bewteen Church and State – there are those in our country who are still living with the horror of what was done do them.
As a nation – there are many conversations we still need to have – painful conversations – we need to face our past, honestly, truthfully and without flinching, otherwise our future will be forever blighted in more ways than one.

Survivors Who Stand Together

Stolen childhoods and blighted lives – child abuse in industrial schools

The abuse detailed in the report by the Commission to Inquire into Child Abuse was described by Enda Kenny as 'torture, pure and simple'.
The abuse detailed in the report by the Commission to Inquire into Child Abuse was described by Enda Kenny as ‘torture, pure and simple’.

In the course of compiling her book, ‘Stolen Lives’, Bette Brown has come to believe that the abuse of children in industrial schools was one of the darkest chapters in Ireland’s history.

TOWER BRIDGE stands majestically in the morning sunlight above the Saturday strollers. Among them, Mary Collins is admiring the scene in the city of London that she now calls home but her peace is fleeting.

Fear suddenly seizes her like a physical grip on the back of her head and she is a little girl again, running with her mother through…

View original post 1,518 more words

Regrets? I Have a Few…….

 

Am sure everyone – well anyone as old as me – remembers that classic song by the inimitable Francis Albert “Frank” Sinatra, “My Way” and for those who are now rolling their eyes up to heaven, here it is.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePs6bHsQx6A

The lyrics here

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/franksinatra/myway.html

So you can sing along 🙂

“My Way”

And now, the end is here

And so I face the final curtain

My friend, I’ll say it clear

I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain

I’ve lived a life that’s full

I traveled each and ev’ry highway

And more, much more than this, I did it my way

 

Regrets, I’ve had a few

But then again, too few to mention

I did what I had to do and saw it through without exemption

I planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway

And more, much more than this, I did it my way

 

Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew

When I bit off more than I could chew

But through it all, when there was doubt

I ate it up and spit it out

I faced it all and I stood tall and did it my way

 

I’ve loved, I’ve laughed and cried

I’ve had my fill, my share of losing

And now, as tears subside, I find it all so amusing

To think I did all that

And may I say, not in a shy way,

“Oh, no, oh, no, not me, I did it my way”

 

For what is a man, what has he got?

If not himself, then he has naught

To say the things he truly feels and not the words of one who kneels

The record shows I took the blows and did it my way!

[instrumental] 

Yes, it was my way

The link to the article that GOM (Grumpy Old Man) posted on the “Edge of The Cliff” essay in his reply (that I will get to shortly) triggered a memory – a memory of a funeral – no – this is not a sad morbid post – this is a memory of a woman who’s life deserved to be celebrated.

http://topinfopost.com/2014/05/12/top-5-regrets-people-make-on-their-deathbed

As the funeral ended and as the coffin bearing this extraordinary woman was carried out of the church – the priest announced that she had picked a song to be played as this was being done – that song was “My Way” by Frank Sinatra – it epitomised and encapsulated the type of human being she was – and in the midst of tears and grief an overwhelming feeling of gratitude and joy swept over me that I had had the extraordinary honour and privilege to have known her. She lived her life on her terms, at a time when doing so wasn’t exactly the “done thing” here in Ireland – was she a saint? Nope but she was someone who did it “My Way

With humour, with grace, with wit and with a sense of what could only be called style that was uniquely her own. She had “charisma” that indefinable something that many aspire to, but very few possess – she was a close friend of my mothers, and I was just beginning to become old enough to really appreciate her and transition from her friend’s daughter to being privileged to be counted as her friend in my own right when she passed away.

Odd isn’t it the connections that we make between things, or what triggers memories?

The article is about regrets also – about what people close to coming to the end almost always express as things they have regretted. Go read the article first and then come back to this – because this is a “thinking out loud” exercise on my part – a sort of personal take on how this article and that song have resonated with me – am more than cognisant that there are those who will view this cynically and do that “eye rolling thing” and you know what – I don’t care, go read something else.

In many ways I would consider myself to be a idealist, perhaps even a bit naive in that I believe that there are things we should be idealistic about, things we should aspire to other than material, superficial and temporal things – that human beings can and should strive for these, I suppose higher things – not everything has to be so clever, or so cynical, not everything has to be used as a vehicle for self aggrandisement, spite or “getting one up” on someone else, or even as I have begun to observe, displaying all the nastiest, most unscrupulous and egotistical characteristics that human beings possess.

Nor do I believe that people either should be dictated to, or disdained or vilified simply on the basis that they happen to NOT accept or subscribe to every single tenet of a majority (both spoken and unspoken – implied or otherwise) – of the actions or behaviours of every single person with whom they are supposed to, or expected to owe some kind of allegiance to.

From my personal perspective – I really really don’t give a shit what label you wear – whether in the eyes of any number of people, or for that matter in the eyes of that person themselves, that label is some kind of talisman, a magic shield that protects you – that you can wave it and claim immunity because of this label.

Nor do I believe that any one person is crucial to any movement – not unless that person is a William Wilberforce or a Nelson Mandela, a Martin Luther King or even a Bob Geldof those kinds of people are rare – ordinary people doing extraordinary things, and to be blunt so far, I personally haven’t encountered one of those. But I live in hope.

I do what I do because I want to – if I stopped, it wouldn’t make a blind bit of difference – in fact would actually make my life so much easier – for a start I wouldn’t have to deal with the crap I’m dealing with now – I could slip back into obscurity and my life would go on, and the MHRM movement would go on without a blip.

There are things I believe in, and things that I do not – the things I believe in are relatively simple and are encompassed by the overarching principles of Universal Human Rights – for ALL human beings – and as far I am concerned women are human beings – in fact even feminists are human beings.

Do I believe that what most feminists choose to believe is unutterable crap? Absolutely. Or that a lot of women have a warped and twisted and definitely over-estimated perspective of their “value” as human beings as opposed to the value as human beings of men? Again, absolutely.

All this “goddess” shit and “because I’m worth it” crap – sheesh!

Personally – I don’t subscribe to the view that “anything goes” either in real life or on the internet or for that matter within the MHRM or any other “movement” for that matter, including feminism – though I do acknowledge any persons – calling themselves and subscribing to the “beliefs” of feminism – RIGHT to believe whatever rubbish they like, and to express it. Whatever – believe the earth is flat for all care – believe that we are descended from an alien race that “seeded” this planet millennia ago and all this is one vast “project” I don’t – and will damn well express that opinion whether you like it or not, because like I said, believe whatever rubbish you like, so not the issue, but don’t get on your high horse and tell me what to believe!

So, onto the article.

The author lists the top five  regrets that those nearing the end most express. The first is:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

 

This one resonated with me – over the course of my life I have lacked that courage from time to time – weighed up my dreams against what I thought I should do, against what I really wanted to do, or ought to do – let things go – or made choices that really weren’t being “true to myself” but I think lots of people do that – you live the life you believe you have – follow the path of least resistance. Not to say that compromise isn’t a valid option – it is – but there’s compromise and then there’s letting other people’s expectations dictate your actions. The whole “don’t rock the boat” thing – or the “but everybody else believes/thinks/feels like this

The second one is this:

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

 

The author makes the point that this one is heard from every male patient she had (I’m presuming the author is female) and it speaks to the expectations placed upon men over the course of human history to be the providers, the protectors of their families – expectations that not just emanated from cultural and societal attitudes but from within the paradigm of male female relationships – a paradigm that is now being twisted and corrupted and hurled back at these men as a weapon to demonise them. Feminism. It could take the most positive and enriching thing and turn it into something toxic.

Number three is this one:

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

 

This is the where the memory got triggered – and I went and listened to Frank  doing it “his way” I’ve read this part now about seven or eight times – had a bit of a sit on my doorstep – had a bit of a think and a ponder – and reflected on events in my life over the last 7/8 months, and a bit further back.

Having said that – as an individual I’ve never really had a problem “expressing my feelings” have I always expressed them in the most appropriate ways? Hell no……….tact and diplomacy were never my strong suit – and yes I know that I have hurt other people’s feelings as a result. But, I defy anyone to show me a person who hasn’t done that – someone is who so saintly that they have never just blurted something out, lost the plot, allowed external pressures or circumstances to dictate how they reacted to something?

Not excusing it – am simply saying – shit happens – and when shit happens – as human beings we don’t always behave in the absolute best way – I don’t – and though personally I’ve always had strong views, about things that I’ve had views about – they generally didn’t and even now don’t exactly align with the views of a lot of people.

It wasn’t long after I’d entered the world of the MHRM, that I realised there were simply some things I just didn’t agree with – that I personally did not and couldn’t subscribe to – so I found myself drifting over lines – modifying my personal beliefs, and not saying anything in order to “keep the peace with others” this has now resulted in me becoming disenchanted with certain elements within the MHRM, and to be honest to question the direction and motives of some elements – I look at some of the stuff I read and see – and I look at and read a lot – quite a bit of it is crap – or it is just simply taking the wrong tack – it is taking the almost exactly polarised position to feminism – all women are bad – all men are good. In my opinion. 🙂

This is simply not true – I see people posting poisonous comments and waving statistics around as if this was somehow proof positive that the MHRM was right and feminism was wrong.

When in actuality – Some women are bad, some women are good, some men are good some men are bad – and in between there are all sorts – both male and female.

For me there IS a third way – for example take DV – the consensus is this – mutual IPV hovers around the 42% mark – depending on which study you read – unidirectional IPV is almost equally divided between men and women.

This means in effect, that of the around 23% of ALL persons who engage in these kinds of behaviour – HALF – as in almost EQUAL numbers – are male and HALF are females, and in their own individual ways, are horrible nasty violent and abusive shitheads, EQUALLY.

Feminism ignores male victims and the MHRM ignores female victims – which in my mind makes both just as bad as one another.

BOTH “sides” use exactly the same tactics to demonise the other – by emphasising the GENDERED nature of each sides “case” when any reputable study or research will tell you – GENDER is the least important element of what contributes to violent abusive behaviour in HUMAN BEINGS.

Those are my opinions – and I realise that this appeals to neither feminists or the MHRM – but – that is exactly what I think – both sides are just as bad as one another – when the issue is about violent human beings – of any gender – and granted it is feminism that controls the narrative in this area – for now – but I personally don’t need to reference feminism in order to point out the facts – the facts speak for themselves – if as a result of that then feminism ends up with egg all over its face – so be it.

 

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

 

This one caused me great sadness – I had a friend from school, a great friend – we got into all sorts of trouble together (nothing serious) – over the years we stayed in touch from time to time, then stuff would get in the way and we wouldn’t be in contact for ages – about three years ago – having known she lived not too far from me and having been saying to myself “I must drop down and say hello” – I did eventually – it had been playing on my mind for some time – so off I went – her husband opened the door and he had a very strange look when he saw me.

He told me that my friend had died about 6 months before, and that they had no way of getting in touch with me.

I’ve had to do a lot of grieving over the last three years – have lost four people who meant a lot to me – one in particular two years ago – I had lost touch with three of them – and that I deeply regret.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness

This one gave me some pause – “let myself be happier” then it struck me – no-one can make you happy – only doing things that you enjoy, you believe in, or that you want to do, makes you happy – living your life worrying about whether or not doing what makes you happy, makes other people happy is pointless – and I do agree with what she says here that “”Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content.” Now that does resonate – because it is living a life dictated by what others expect – and how they expect you to live your life.

There is of course a caveat to that – if what “makes you happy” is either hurtful or harmful to other people – or causes other people unhappiness then – nope.

Anyhoo back to Frank – so yes – for me “Regrets, I’ve had a few….but then again…too few to mention” what I have in fact done, is learnt something, I hope from every experience – both good and bad.

For anyone reading this who actually does know me in real life –THAT is the song I would like played at my funeral.

Then bury me on hillside in Connemara overlooking the sea. Thanks. 🙂

The Road Less Travelled………..

 

I’ve been doing a bit of spring-cleaning – sort of mental spring-cleaning – events over the last couple of months have literally shaken me to my very core. But then, we all have those periods in our lives where one finds oneself either being swept along by events or having events sweep over us and swamp us.

What has precipitated this mental spring-cleaning was this – one of my most valued and respected commenter’s, sent me a poem, a poem this person was not to know  has been one of personal favourites since school

I recall the first time I read it, or at the time was forced to read it, it resonated with me in a way, that to be honest poetry usually doesn’t, it is a rare poem that does that – but this one did, and as I said, has been a personal favourite for most of my life, and don’t worry am not going to go into an arty farty analysis of this poem.

 

The Road Not Taken – Robert Frost, 1874 – 1963

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

 

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

 

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

 

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I–

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

 

https://www.poets.org/poetsorg/poem/road-not-taken

Anyway back to the mental spring cleaning – I took a road some seven months ago when I started this blog, but up until then I was content to comment on other sites, most particularly on AVfM. My goal at that time was to continue to do that (comment) and continue to research a book that had been percolating in my head for about five years.

Between then and now, several things have happened that looking back I should have given more thought to, should have taken more time to reflect on – had I done so – perhaps I would not be writing what I am writing now. Having said that, I have learned things, some good, some not so good and some that I am still trying to process and figure out.

One of the steps on that path I took was when I made the decision to “go public” eventually, with a friend, a real life friend that is, and a fellow member of MRI (Men’s Rights Ireland) we did a “pros and cons” thing – having spent some time around the internet – a lot more than I had ever previously – I already knew that, to be blunt, it had its good, its bad and its downright nasty.

I have over the last 7/8 months encountered almost equal proportions of all of those types, and sometimes discovered that it is difficult to tell them apart. But, it is like that in real life too isn’t it?

One of the most unfortunate things that I have personally have learnt is that even within the so called MHRM – there are those who relish and seem to thrive on being as nasty, and as unscrupulous as the avowed enemies of the MHRM – feminists.

To say I am disenchanted with the MHRM would be an understatement – does that mean that I have “gone over to the other side?” absolutely not – if by that is meant, am I becoming a feminist?

Absolutely not – hell will freeze over before that happens – have never been a feminist and will never be a feminist. Ever.

But while I am sick to death of reading the drivel that spews out of the mouths and keyboards of feminists from the most moronic to the supposedly most academic (sigh) I am almost as equally sick to death reading the almost equally moronic, equally angry rants, vitriol speckled and hate filled spewings of some MRA/MHRA’s.

And yes I know I also post “rants” and also “go after” feminists and most recently a MRA/MHRA “group” – and by the way I stand by every word I wrote. Will get back to that another time.

There are individuals I admire enormously, who post and write under the amorphous banner of the MHRM – but do so as individuals, which I personally prefer, never been a “joiner” each to their own!

Have I suddenly woken up and embraced the NAWALT mantra either? Nope – unfortunately a vast majority of women ARE like that – with that being a major part of why our societies and cultures are in the mess they are now.

But I also know something – that it is the cultural and societal context that prevails in various different societies and the over-arching framework of legislative and political “norms” that allows those women who are “like that” to belike that” and that this does not apply with either equal influence or equal force, or in the same ways, in every single culture.

Ireland is a case in point – a very particular case in point – we have in this country so many layers of interwoven and interconnected “issues” balanced against the backdrop of our equally unique history that citing feminism as the only cause is both wilfully ignorant and deliberately disingenuous, and runs the risk of failing to address to major issues that beset and have beset this country in an attempt to point a finger at a handy “enemy” letting other equally culpable “enemies” slid quietly off the hook and disappear in a fog of populist rhetoric, rabble rousing polemics, and ill-informed badly researched, sloppily put together, self aggrandising soapboxing “articles”

I love this country, I cannot imagine living anywhere else, I wouldn’t live anywhere else, in spite of all its faults and failing, innumerable problems, serious social cultural and political issues that at times seem insurmountable I love my country. While I have encountered some right eejits and gobshoites of both sexes, in general Irish people (other than feminist academic ones that is) are good people.

Not perfect people, not saints, not angels – just people – both male and female – is it getting rarer and rarer to find good women? Yes it is – but they are to be found, just as there are some Irish men that you wouldn’t piss on if they were on fire. With the caveat that any feminist is by default a total wretch.

When I started this – taking this path into the world of the MHRM – my original focus was on two things – exposing the vile toxic roots of feminism and how it had spread from its original source(s) in both the US and the UK – mostly – and had begun to infect all other parts of the western hemisphere, including to some extent Ireland, and advocating for changes within Ireland to public policy, legislation, and cultural and social attitudes that were and are undermining the Human Rights, in specific areas, of Irish men.

That’s it – that was my goal. But, I got distracted. I allowed myself to get swept along a different path. I allowed things that were not good, not positive to become part of my “agenda” for want of a better word.

Am I indebted to many individuals who have inspired me, giving me insight into perspectives that I hadn’t considered before? Absolutely, and off the top of my head Robert St Estephe, Angryharry, Fidelbogan, Janet Bloomfield, Alison Tieman, the guys at Gynocentrism, John Hembling, Diana Davison spring to mind.

But, my focus was, at the start my own backyard – Ireland – and that is where I intend to primarily focus on from now on, both on this blog and on MRI (Men’s Rights Ireland) from different perspectives of course. Do I wish all those dedicated individuals in various different countries all over this world my very best in their own struggles against the toxic influences of feminism in their particular backyards and on their particular battlegrounds? With all my heart.

In many ways your struggles are greater, your “enemy” is more deeply entrenched and determined, and you have many more years of this malign infection to root out and consign to the garbage can of history – hopefully never to be allowed to take root again.

My fear is that, while in many respects Ireland has escaped the full force of feminist influence, not all of it, we’ve always had too many other bloody problems to contend with, to be able to afford to pander to the most outrageous demands of feminist nutjobs – but we are on the brink – with the EU breathing down our necks and basically having us by the short and curly’s – it won’t take much – and it won’t take that long, unless we take steps now to halt this shit in its tracks.

I’ve posted some new links on the blogroll – some useful information on those sites – am not endorsing or saying “these are great sites” go here – just that there is some useful information to be gleaned from them.

With regard to MRI (Men’s Rights Ireland) – we – and yes there is a “we” have been reassessing and revaluating our focus as well – but – because I’ve personally been dealing with more shit in the last couple of months personally than I have in quite a while – it had been put on hold so that I could.

While I have posted on this blog – it has been by way of being a strange kind of “therapy” from my perspective this blog is my baby – but MRI (Men’s Rights Ireland) is and will be a joint effort of several people – one or two who have had their own difficulties to deal with in the last couple of months – it never rains but it pours does it?

I do want to thank all those who have over the last 7/8 months and in particular in the last month or so who have posted some really interesting, intriguing and thought provoking comments, and especially some very kind ones – thank you.

I have spent the last couple of days going through all the comments and during my travels I have found myself pausing and re-reading and thinking – now that comment should be an article – so – I will be emailing a couple of people who have posted these comments to invite you to submit them as an article for MRI (Men’s Rights Ireland) – well you do know that I get your email address when you post a comment?  🙂

Don’t panic – won’t be for a week or so – and sure – you can just say no.

As for those who have taken the time to post less that positive comments – and am not talking about criticisms of anything I have written – just long streams of mostly incomprehensible shoite – fuck off – grow up – get a life – get a hobby.

I turned on moderation on ALL comments, even for those that previously just got posted automatically about two or three weeks ago I think – because to be honest I wanted to be able to view every comment before I clicked “approve” MOST comments as soon as I see the name get “approved” and unless a comment relates to whatever the article the comment appears on – it gets DELETED.

I am a big advocate of Free Speech – it is a fundamental Human Right – but even that has limits – and long poisonous rants are mine.

To my friend who sent me the poem – many thanks for reminding me of something that I thought I had lost – long story – if you ever find yourself in Ireland the Guinness is on me and I’ll tell it to you, it involves falling off a horse, an actual horse not a metaphorical one, which then proceeded to shit on my head………

🙂

 

How Dare You Have an Opinion……On Me!

 

Two things – first this delightful little quote I have often heard women use with regard to the “men in their lives” (and this little phrase is one we will be coming back to)

when I want your opinion, I will give it to you

The second thing is about me, a piece of advice I was given by a careers teacher way back in the mists of time when I was “young”

you’re very opinionated for a 16 year old – you should think about curbing that, and doing a secretarial course

Now, before any feminist decides to pounce on this as an example of “oppression” and “patriarchy” the teacher was female and she had never had an original thought in her entire life – of this I am convinced, and she didn’t like me, at all, for various reasons, mostly centred around me being “opinionated”

As you can probably see, if you’ve read any of my scribblings, not a piece of advice I took seriously or followed, ever.

Moving On.

Women, with the bedrock of feminist cant and drivel backing them up, have now inculcated a very insidious and egotistical state of mind – no-one, especially men, is allowed to have an opinion, other than a positive one, of anything they do, say or are.

In fact, with regard to having opinions, men are now not allowed to have an opinion on anything, just in case it clashes with whatever ephemeral or passing “opinion” on said subject that a woman has, any woman, on anything. Though, that “opinion” could change on a daily basis.

If as a man for example, you like go kart racing, and a female has allowed you “into her life” and in her opinion, go kart racing is stupid/boring/ridiculous/not my cup of tea – it will then be expected that you, a mere man, will now abandon your pleasure, your hobby, the thing that is your cup of tea – forever.

Woe betide you, if you sneak off on a Saturday afternoon with a couple of mates for an hour or two of sheer unadulterated pleasure – while she is at the hairdressers (could be anything up to four hours), at her mother’s (at least three hours) at her best friend’s (anything between an hour and eternity, depends on how much you have pissed her off that week) shopping (on a Saturday, and there are sales on? – at least six hours)

Annnnnnnnd she finds out!

Mate – you are now in the absolute shit – the doghouse – the outer realms of the universe where all men are consigned who do something that a female has specifically told you – SHE doesn’t like.

I might add, this egregious calumny is compounded if she has assigned you tasks to be done “while I’m off doing something really really important”.

I know, I know, you’re going to try logic and reason – everything on the list was done in record time, so “what’s the big deal?”

Sigh – tut tut – it’s “all about trust” doncha know – “you prooooooooooomised”.  It’s all about “letting her down” about her “feeeeeeeelings

By the way, even if you “cheated” and hired an expert to do whatever your assigned task was – it will be a “shit job” – it was “done wrong” – now she has to “hire someone” to “get it done right!”. Probably the same bloke YOU hired to do it in the first place.

I can almost guarantee that as he walks in to “do a proper job” you will exchange looks – because he probably has his own live-in wretch, tormenting the life and soul out of HIM, every bloody minute of the morning noon and night.

So, what has this to do with me and being “opinionated”? Well, granted in my youth my opinions were half and half actual knowledge of something that I had formed an opinion about, and my “feelings” about something – they of course tended to be very black and white – right or wrong – good or bad, no gray areas.

But my parents would have none of that – my mother – “give me a reason” sigh. My father – “how do you know that, have you checked to see if it’s true/right?” double sigh.

The little scenario I outlined above is a bit of a conglomeration of various different incidents I’ve observed over the years – the go karting thing though – was actually the secret passion of a bloke I knew.

What underpins all this is that SHE “let YOU into her life” – did ye not know – men don’t have lives, passions, interests or a separate existence? Men are only “of use”, men either “compliment a woman’s life” or “make it harder

As for the original premise, and the title of this essay – “How dare you have an opinion, on me!” this is the female ace in the hole – it IS the get out of jail free card par excellence – because if you take back YOUR right to have an opinion on any damn thing you like, the “magic spell” is broken the one where being “allowed into my life” is not so much a gift, the beneficence of a higher being allowing you to bask in her glory – it reveals itself as what it really is.

A selfish, egotistical, vain, shallow wretch, bullying another human being, using emotional blackmail, and coercing another human being into doing things that undermine and make little of their value as an autonomous human being.

To all those men who might be thinking, especially with regard to Getting you to “do things” her way – “ah sure, she just likes things done right, she just wants the house to look good

Bullshit. Shall I repeat that? BULLSHIT.

Most of the petty, useless things that women assign you to do, and will never thank you for, appreciate or acknowledge are designed to “keep you busy” to “keep you on your toes” they are devices, artefacts created to control, to demean, to enslave you further and further into a state of existence where your only function is to meet and serve  – “her needs

Any person who would throw the equivalent of a tantrum because another person has an interest or hobby that they don’t like/share/find interesting is a wretch.  Any person who demands that you “do things” for them, on their terms, and will explode/sulk/whine/ if you either can’t, or don’t want to do them is a bullying wretch.

 

I believe I just described quite a lot women. In my opinion.

 

© Anja Eriud 2014

 

PS Go Karting is great craic (fun) 🙂

“I Wonder………..”

 

For some odd reason I recalled a conversation I had with a lovely and very charming young woman some time a couple of years ago, she had apparently heard me give one of my impromptu “speeches” about “the evils of feminism” in the middle of the day to some bewildered students.

Anyhoo, outside the arts building she approached me and asked “what kind of woman should I be?”

She also elaborated a bit, she had a brother who had died tragically the year before and she mourned him deeply, he was “her best friend” and she couldn’t correlate the things she was hearing in her lectures with either her beloved brother, her father or any male person she knew, or had ever known – she was a first year, and without even asking I knew what she was studying.

But of course I did ask – Sociology, Anthropology and History – sigh, (not the History, obviously)  the next question I asked of course was,  “What do you want to do, what area do you see yourself working in?

“Teaching or social work?  She said.

Which of course means, after first year she would probably drop history, and take the modules leading to the Social Science/Work Degree.

But my answer was that she stop thinking about what kind of woman she should, or could be, and simply embrace  her humanity, and that focusing on “being a woman” would suffocate and eventually extinguish her ability to do this – her current study path was one sure fire way to do exactly that, diminish her ability to exercise her humanity. Well, I know what they teach in these lectures, you all know what they teach, and we all know it is total and utter crap – which is why I said to her  –

“Forget about “being a woman” forget about your darling brother as “being a man” – and concentrate on being a human being, and remembering what a wonderful human being your brother was”

Being “a woman” or “being a man” is incidental to being a human being, because if you focus on that, you will realise that this opens up a whole world of wider and higher principles to aspire to, it allows you to transcend petty issues of “gender” of alleged differences in treatment, of manufactured “inequalities” and superficial social and cultural conventions.

It will allow you to shake off and reject the script written by small minded, spiteful, vindictive and malicious female human beings who call themselves feminists and have hijacked the conversation, the discourse, the very language of and about human interaction, of humanity, and what it means to be a human being.

Even our language has been warped and twisted, words have become vested with nasty meanings meant to deride and vilify one half of humanity.

Words like, courage, valour, strength, integrity and honour – and while you probably won’t find them in the library, the tales of valour, of courage and strength that epitomises the endeavours of the men who explored, challenged, strived and struggled to create the civilisation of comfort, safety and convenience you probably take for granted around you –  are worth reading.

There is one other word that should be added to that list – inventiveness.

Try and imagine for one moment if men such as Johannes GutenbergThe Printing Press (though there is some dispute about whether he invented it, or as a result of tinkering, developed a workable and viable model) Thomas EdisonOver a thousand inventions, Alexander FlemingPenicillin, had all decided – “sod it, couldn’t be bothered” and no other man could have been bothered either.

Try and imagine for one moment that no man ever looked at the world around him and began thinking; –

 “I wonder……..”

Because that is what feminism not just seeks to persuade you, to pressure you, to tell you, but to demand, to coerce, to insist and to make unlawful for you and any other human person to do; –

To wonder, to question, to examine, to be curious, to explore possibilities and follow the trail that leads from “I wonder………” to wherever it ends up.

Feminism seeks to trap and ensnare you in a cage, in a shell of being, in a rigid uncompromising and limiting entity called “being a woman” and if you think THAT cage is restrictive, you have no idea of the cage that they assign men to.

The shackles and chains, the bonds and ropes that men must – they insist, they demand, wear inside THEIR cages. These cages that they constructed to contain, to control, to destroy, what they have named “toxic masculinity”

These cages that have been constructed of lies and myths, of false and manufactured data and statistics, of the hysterical and poisonous rantings, writings and incomprehensible garbage of dysfunctional, hate filled, spiteful and malicious females.

It kind of sounds like I hate women, doesn’t it?

Actually I don’t, neither as a class, nor with rare exceptions as individuals – derision, contempt and scorn, these are the words that best describe my “feelings” towards women as a class, and as women on an individual basis, to varying degrees, as and when I encounter them. They are directed at what women say, what they do, how they behave, what they have become – not at them as female human beings or as autonomous entities. The reason is simple, they are autonomous sentient human beings, ergo they CHOOSE to act, to believe, and to be the way they are. To be this limited, superficial and vacuous creature called “woman”

I hold them, and will continue to hold them, and myself of course, accountable – because that is what defines and marks human beings out from every other species on this planet. The unique ability to be self – aware, and to CHOOSE, every single, without exception – action.  Absent of course human beings who have an intellectual, psychological or physiological disability which robs them, or deprives them of this ability.

It also sounds like I am doing what feminists claim the mystical patriarchy has done to women throughout the ages – written women out of history.

Again, nope, but until the advent of the Industrial Revolution, women were constrained, were limited, with very few exceptions, by not just their own physical limitations, but by what they were designed to do –  I suppose by Mother Nature/evolution,  and what they COULD do.

Therefore, when it came to sometimes being able, by the very nature of the limited range of occupations available for both men and women, to do significant things, things that impacted upon the course of human history it was simply that men worked in areas that positioned them in a place where they could wonder, could reflect on what they had to do and say; –

“I wonder………”

Some of those early inventions, the prototypes that generated and precipitated a succession of improved versions, of a little tweak here, and a little tweak there, that led to the myriad range of devices and objects we don’t even notice any more. Never mind wondering where did the original idea come from, and from whom?

To the development of the improved and constantly improving physical structure of our societies and cultures, that came about as the result of tinkering and striving to create a better tool, a better way of “doing something” of performing some essential task, that generally benefitted and improved the lives of those for whom the vast majority of men worked FOR.

Their wives and children.

A rather simple example, I grew up in the 1960’s and 1970’s, if I wanted to talk to someone about something, I had two choices, I could physically go and knock on their front door and say “Hi, can I talk you about something?” or I could write a letter, walk to the post office, buy a stamp and post said letter, then wait – and depending on how far away they lived, that wait could be anything up to a week, for an answer.

Of course, we had access to telephones, but we, my family that is didn’t have a telephone till about 1980 (ish) In an emergency, we could ask a slightly more affluent neighbour, but it would have to BE an emergency.

I’ve had real time conversations with people in the UK, in the USA, in Canada and in various other far flung places in the world in the last few months – I rarely give it a thought now – I text friends with random questions or just say “Hi, how you doing” and get a reply back almost instantly. So, who do we have to thank for this?

Step up Martin Cooper. If you click on the link, the size of the first “mobile” phone will make you laugh, if you were born after say 1983.

In the 1600’s and 1700’s and definitely before this would have been considered magic, in the 1970’s and 1980’s it WAS considered science fiction – look at the communication devices in the original Star Trek series – can you see how that might have been the inspiration for mobile/cell phones?

Because somewhere, some man found himself thinking “I wonder………”

 Our physical lives have improved in ways that would have stunned and rendered speechless our ancestors and previous generations, including my own generation and my parents, but with an enormous sadness that I sometimes find quite difficult to articulate, as human beings, as sentient autonomous beings with access to the writings, the thoughts and the inspirational thinking of too many great men to list, and to be fair, a few great women – we have floundered, we have de-evolved, we have become base creatures, driven by the most crude and unenlightened impulses.

For 50 years and more our cultures and societies have been subjected to a mode of thinking, a set of beliefs, an ideological influence that is as coarse, as primitive, as corrupt and as vile as the worst of all vile ideologies.

It is savage and barbaric, it is as corrosive and toxic as harnessing the worst aspects of humanity could make it.

It IS what feminism is.

All the worst things that human beings could, and can be, peddled as the “truth” as the template for human progress, for what human beings are supposed to be.

So, to the lovely and charming Shauna*, don’t worry, don’t think about “being a woman” strive to be the best human being you can be. Always.

 

© Anja Eriud 2014

 

*Not this charming young woman’s name. I met her strangely enough last year – she had as she said “started again” she had decided what she wanted to do, really wanted to be – was a veterinarian. Wonders will never cease. 🙂

 

“The Pursuit of Happyness”

 

No, it isn’t a typo or a misspelling – it is the title of a book, and a film based on the book, The Pursuit of Happyness by Chris Gardner.  But yes, it also a concept, and one that is enshrined in the Constitution of The United States of America.

Pursuing, and having the Right to pursue happiness.

With an apology to my American readers, I have always found this a bit problematic, making the pursuit of something that defies definition a Right – because as we all know – what makes someone happy is a particularly unique and individual thing.

“One’s man’s feast is another’s man’s famine.”

An example, when it is not raining or cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey, I like to sit on my back door step, and watch the sun go down, I live in the country, and I am surrounded by fields and trees, this particular spot gives me a view of nothing but trees with the setting sun shimmering through the leaves. It is a great place to sit and think.  For me this is sheer contentment, peace and stillness – it is happiness.

For others, it would be incomprehensible, just sitting there, doing nothing, looking at trees! Boooooooooooring!  

From my perspective, I’m not doing nothing, I am doing something, thinking, being still, watching the sun go down on another day.  In fact, if I have spent the day “doing something” or a whole lot of “something’s” – sitting on that step and “doing nothing” is what I look forward to doing. In essence my pursuit of happiness leads to a doorstep.

The story of Chris Gardner is the story of a man, his son, and how he overcame what where significant challenges, troubles and a lot of pain to get to a place where he could be happy. On one level it is the story of pursuing happiness, but it is also the story of a man whose pursuit of happiness caused him pain, was difficult, challenged him and plunged him into the depths of despair. It is also the story of a father and his son.

For Chris, happiness was having a job, having a home for himself and his son, feeling safe, being safe, keeping his son safe. It is a remarkable story, a story of a man who set his goal, then worked to reach that goal. Will Smith who portrays Chris in the film, and with his own son Jaden playing the part of Chris’s son,  called Christopher (an adorable and engaging little boy – the type of child what we here in Ireland would say about – “I could just run away with that child”) does an incredible job of acting.

The iconic scene is when after working as an intern in Dean, Witter, Reynolds in San Francisco, for no salary for six months he is called into the boardroom and told, in an especially charming way that out of 20 potential candidates for just the one job on offer, he has got it.

He is told to “wear a shirt tomorrow” as rather than this being his last day, tomorrow will be his first day.

If you do watch the film, pay attention to how Will Smith portrays receiving the news, on the surface he says all the right things, he thanks them, he acts with incredible dignity, but in his eyes, on his face, one see’s the emotion, the gratitude, the joy and happiness and relief of a man who has struggled, who has persevered, who has suffered pain. Did I get a lump in my throat?  Of course I did.

Oddly, even though I knew that Chris Gardner reached his goal, watching his struggles, I found myself wishing, hoping and praying – please let him get the job – please let him get the job – daft, I know.

By the way, I do realise that the film presents this story in a particular way, that poetic licence is taken with some aspects of the actual events that transpired.  Having said that, the story is grounded IN actual events, in one man’s reality – as a story or as a film presentation of a story it is a remarkable and inspiring one.

Which brings us to this – theHappiness Survey.

To summarise, women in general are miserable, unhappy, discontented – which is odd when you consider that women in general (and yes I know I’m generalising) have very few “things” that they have to struggle to achieve, to get, to obtain – they are given preferential treatment in school, in applying to college and in gaining  employment.

In one scene of the film, Chris tries to get a place to sleep for himself and his son in a shelter, but is told that they only “take women” ironically he is told they will “take his son in” but not him. So, even when women, in general, find themselves in dire straits – and being homeless with a child is probably the direst of all dire straits – they (women) find refuge, are offered help and assistance – a place to sleep.

Still, women all over the western world are unhappy, and are apparently pissed off about it, because “being happy” has been embedded in the consciousness of women as a Right – they are entitled to be happy – not being happy is an infringement of their “Rights

Chris makes a point about this – this Right to be happy – but rather than taking it a Right to BE happy – he gets the nuance – it is the Right to PURSUE happiness – to be free to achieve happiness by your own efforts. What he defines as “happyness” what will allow him to reach a place of being happy – is centred around being able to provide for himself and his son – a roof over their heads, being safe, being together.

What he never does, is whine, is demand, is expect any of this to be handed to him on a plate – he expects to have to work for it, he knows that it will be down to his efforts, his determination to not give up, his struggle, and he does have to struggle.

The film does not sugar coat this remarkable journey, nor does it shrink from showing that Chris is human, he despairs, he rails against the situation he finds himself in, he loses his temper, with his son, but then almost immediately apologises to the child, and says something to the boy that resonates.

“don’t ever let anyone tell you what you can’t do, not even me!”

Contained in this message, this lesson to his son is another message, another lesson – that what you want to do requires that YOU do it – you work for it – YOU decide how to achieve it. Considering that every step of the way of Chris Snr’s journey, Christopher Jr is alongside, this boy, this child had seen, and was seeing, firsthand how his father struggled, how his father overcame and worked his way to where he wanted to go – it was not just words, it was a message, a lesson that they were living, that this little boy was learning alongside his father.

Almost all writings by women on how women can and should be happy take it from this position – what do women want? What do women need to be happy? What needs to change for women to be happy?

I have never seen a single piece of writing, nor have I ever heard a woman articulate this.  But am willing to be corrected on this – but bear in mind – I read – I read A LOT.

What do I need to DO, what steps to I need to take, how can I WORK towards, by my own efforts a state of happiness?

Happiness is deemed to be something that is bestowed upon one – as a Right – it is an entitlement – it is something that emanates from outside oneself – it is an external “thing” that is given to one. But most of all, it is something that you own, you should own, and it is something that should benefit ONLY you.

Back to the Doorstep.

When I sit on that doorstep, I am content, at peace – not all the time – it is a feeling of stillness, of being alone with my thoughts and of watching the sun go down. Of putting myself into context with the wider world – I am one lone human being in a world of human beings living on a planet – watching the sun go down reminds me that I am not the world, never mind the universe. What I do when I’m not sitting on that doorstep dictates whether or not the next time I sit there and watch the sun go down I will or won’t be in a state of happiness, or contentment or a bit stressed, tired, irritated, sad, angry – whatever.

Only what I do or don’t do will determine whether my “Pursuit of Happyness” ends in reaching that goal or not – so, for all those women bewailing not “being happy” what are you DOING to achieve that state of happiness you want, but more importantly what are YOU doing that has you stuck in that state of unhappiness?

To conclude, Chris Gardner achieved what can only be called the very heights of success, material success, it would be understandable if he “rested on his laurels” and enjoyed the easy and privileged life he had managed by his own efforts to obtain – so what happened next?

“As a single parent for 25 years, Gardner has demonstrated his concern for the well-being of children through his work with and on behalf of organizations such as the National Fatherhood Initiative, the National Education Association Foundation and the International Rescue Committee. Gardner is still very committed to Glide Memorial Church in San Francisco; where he and his son received assistance in the early 1980’s”

 

© Anja Eriud 2014

 

Note: I was a bit concerned about The Fatherhood Initiative programme that Chris Gardner was cited as a board member of, so I tried to access its webpage, to no avail. Wikipedia was the path I had to take, from here, I was led to here and finally to here.

Was it disappointing? Yes, it was, the emphasis appears to be on re-engaging “absent fathers” with their children, but does not address the core issues that lead to fathers being absent, or rather being forced to be absent from their children’s lives. Does it change my admiration for the remarkable achievement of Chris Gardner? Not at all, but it has confirmed that even though organisations like this one Fatherhood.org  might believe they are doing something positive and worthwhile for and on behalf of fathers, they have only half the story, they are operating on the basis of false information. It is incumbent upon all of us who consider ourselves to be Men’s Human Rights Activists to correct those errors, in knowledge, in attitude, in belief.

To that end, I will go through every resource listed on this site, and when done I will write to them and lay out those errors. I invite anyone who believes that this is an important and necessary task to do likewise.

Will it make a difference? Maybe, maybe not. But we must try, we must at least offer them and other such organisations an alternative perspective.

Anja.

 

 

All My Heroes are Men, most of the people I despise are Women.

 

I know an odd title for an essay, but to give you an idea of what precipitated it, pop over to emma the emo’s blog for a read of this – Women Have no Honour.

“To me it appears that those gender norms are promoted because they are good for society. If men are courageous, they can defend their country. If women are chaste, men feel like being courageous in the first place. I suppose men are still expected to be courageous nowadays (they are drafted), while promiscuity is no big deal for women anymore. In this way, I suppose women really don’t have honor.

 This type of honor is different from the one most people think about when they hear the word. It’s not merely staying true to your principles. It’s society’s way to hold people in check, even when their own principles are lacking or badly developed. Having honor is staying true not to your feelings, but group rules.”

I’ve been doing a lot of research lately, and as I mentioned in the essay about those fruitcakes over at Holy Hormones, and nope, not linking to it again, it was reading random articles about the exploits of men, through the ages that restored my sanity, didn’t prevent me from getting a headache, but made having a headache bearable.

With regard to the title as well, when I think of men, words like nobility, honour, courage, integrity and decency spring to mind, as for women – and being the most likely to make it onto the list of people I despise the most – the feeling is mutual – at this point in my life – it only amuses me – to be honest it never actually bothered me – that women in general tend to dislike me – intensely.  In that extra special “way” that women have of manifesting their “disapproval” fortunately for most of my life, any of the things that women value and attempt to punish you for, by withdrawing or sabotaging, are things that I have never actually valued.

Chief amongst them being admittance to the “girl club” or being “one of the girls” I cannot think of anything that would induce a greater feeling of horror in me that either of those things.

To be fair, I do have, and have had lifelong friends, female friends, who without exception have been women “not like that” I could tell you stories!

So, it has been almost a revelation to me over the last year or so to encounter women like Karen Straughan (GirlWritesWhat), Janet Bloomfield (Judgybitch), Diana Davison (realityisabitch) and astonishingly, a growing number of other females who are not total and utter wretches. Who think, who can string a sentence together, who can objectively and with great intelligence and humour explore an idea, express a concept that does not begin and end with their bloody vaginas and/or uterus’s

The reason – because those qualities that I mentioned that spring to mind when I think of men, spring to my mind when I think of these women – which can only lead to one conclusion.

These are not male qualities per se, they are human qualities of the highest order, ANY human being can CHOOSE to ascribe, to develop, to enact and to display them.

Nobility, honour, courage, integrity and decency are human qualities that women en masse have CHOSEN to reject, to fail to develop, to strive for – in favour of selfishness, self-absorption, pettiness, spitefulness, vindictiveness, vanity and egotism.

By the way, this is not a NAWALT (Not All Women Are Like that) thing – this is a WHY are most women “like that” – thing, and WHY do they not STOP being “like that”

Much is made of the so-called higher order of female qualities, such as caring and nurturing and compassion, of the sacrifices women apparently make for their children, for their “men” of all the tasks that they perform for and on behalf of others.

In fact, I don’t believe it would be an exaggeration to say that women en masse will, and do beat that drum persistently, continuously and ad nauseum about how caring, nurturing, and compassionate they are. What is derisory is that these things – the caring, the nurturing of children in particular – are what one would expect as a natural pattern of behaviour – normal, having children by default assumes that one DOES these things, not as some extra special effort on your part but because – THATS WHAT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO DO!  If you are a decent human being, that is.

There is one woman I want add to the three female human beings who I’ve mentioned as worthy of admiration and respect and to be counted among honourable human beings – my mother.

Two of my mother’s oft repeated phrases, whenever she felt someone was getting “a bit above themselves” were these:

“self praise is no praise”

and

“empty vessels make the most noise”

From her perspective, praise for doing or achieving something was a gift, a gift from others, an acknowledgment that you had done or achieved something worthwhile – demanding it, or expecting it, or reciting your supposed achievements to garner it, invalidated and negated the value of your supposed achievement, or in this instance – quality.

Because, the other thing she was adamant about was this – if the only reason you do something is to GET praise – then doing it is a gesture, an empty shallow gesture meant to benefit ONLY you.

Back to My Heroes.

One of the things that marks out these particular men below, both real and fictional, as worthy heroes and role models, not just for boys but for girls too, is that invariably they were flawed human beings, they were not as women like to portray themselves “visions of perfection” they strove and failed, they were beset by doubts and fears, and they did not consider themselves to BE heroes, they were doing what they believed was the right thing to do – and without exception, for and behalf of others with no expectation of “praise” of “personal gain” or even of sometimes surviving their endeavours.

Janet Bloomfield (aka Judgybitch) wrote an excellent piece on one of my modern day heroes – a fictional character – John McClane – of the Die Hard series of films – I have to say the original is my favourite, and will admit to a secret “admiration” for Bruce Willis – but that’s just between me and thee – ok?

John is everyman, he does what does because he cannot in all conscience do otherwise and live with himself – and no-one else will step up – Janet’s article nails it to a tee, much better than I could.

William Wilberforce the nobility, the courage and the relentless persistence of this man in the face of personal struggles, of mockery, of the disdain of his peers is admirably captured in the film Amazing Grace slavery was, until feminism came along, one of the most egregious stains on the history of humanity – slavery is to dehumanise a human being, to reduce a human being to an object, a piece of property. In William Wilberforce’s time – this was “normal” and here we are in the 21st century, and yet again we have a culture where it is “normal” to view human beings as objects of utility, as property, as less than human.

Aragorn (Strider) – One of my all time favourite books, “The Lord of The Rings” – first read it when I was 16, and read it every year for a long long time – then the  films came out and regrettably I haven’t read it since then.  Aragorn displays that other quality that men have and exercise on behalf of, and for others – leadership – leadership in the face of ,and in spite of their own fears and doubts about themselves, about their leadership abilities – he leads because someone must lead – someone must take responsibility – someone must put the mission first, and their own fears and doubts aside – Aragorn is that man, and is every man who has ever walked towards danger, towards the source of their greatest fear, and towards that which would “chill the heart of me” for others, for a cause, for a mission, for others.

Firefighters, rescue workers, soldiers, almost all men, almost all faced with constant danger, constant threat and always walking towards it, facing it, protecting others from it. Protecting women from it.

“If by my life or death I can protect you, I will. ” Aragorn.

― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring

Ghenghis Khan – now you all think I’ve completely lost the plot. Read this book – Bones of the Hills by Conn Iggulden published in 2009 by Harper – website www.conniggulden.com for more information.

Ghenghis Khan forged a civilisation, a Nation, a nomadic nation out of innumerable warring tribes – never a builder of roads, of monuments, Ghenghis Khan was a unique and exceptional individual, his exploits by our standards were bloodthirsty, but he was a man in, and of his time.

“In the seventeenth century the Muslim chronicler Abu’l Ghazi wrote:

Under the reign of Ghenghis Khan, all the country between Iran and the land of the Turks enjoyed such a peace that a man might have journeyed from sunrise to sunset with a golden platter on his head without suffering the least violence from anyone.”

From: Bones of The Hills by Conn Iggulden; Historical Note – page 542 (own copy – emphasis added)

Feminism and feminists have corrupted and have poisoned our cultures and our nations, have harnessed the ephemeral grip on honour that women have always had, and to be fair were expected to have, unlike the true hard won honour that men have always strived, struggled and fought for  – has diminished to nothingness that load upon women, till to all intents and purposes women now believe they have no need for honour, or integrity or decency.

Sadly, this has become a self-fulfilling prophecy, we worship things, we live in and on the most superficial plane of existence, the banal, the trite, and the asinine have become our touchstones, our standard. The keepers of these things are feminists, they insist, they demand, they blackmail and they coerce so that our cultures remain – dishonourable – superficial – tawdry.

 “A nation lives forever through its concepts, honour, and culture. It is for these reasons that the rulers of nations must judge and act not only on the basis of physical and material interests of the nation but on the basis of the nation’s historical honour, of the nation’s eternal interests. Thus: not bread at all costs, but honour at all costs.”

Corneliu Zelea Codreanu, For My Legionaries

So, when I say that I despise women, with very few rare exceptions, it is not only because they have no honour, but they CHOSE deliberately to have no honour – because – it IS a choice.

The last word goes to my mother:

“You may chose any course of action you wish, good bad or indifferent, what you don’t get to chose are the consequences”

We are living with the consequences of a culture infected with the poison of dishonourable, corrupt and toxic feminism.

 

© Anja Eriud 2014

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