The Price of Everything, The Value of Nothing.



Maybe some of you have heard that expression, my mother used to say it as a warning, a warning to guard against seeing the world through the acquisition of things, of measuring or valuing yourself and others by all the shiny stuff you had.  Inevitably those who could afford the latest gadgets, fashions, and had reached all sort of worldly goals, would cloak themselves in the aura of these things as a mark of how much better than others they were.

She did have a less kind way of expressing this – especially in relation to women – “the fur coat and no knickers brigade” The inference, as I’m sure you’ve guessed being that, the fur coat was acquired because of the no knickers fashion statement. The modern late 20th and early 21st century way, and feminism’s way of playing out this scenario, is through the mechanism of “self-esteem”

To esteem something is to hold it, or him/her in high regard, to place a large value on it. If one esteems something, one vests that thing or person with great worth.

The other element of this pertains to the parameters through which one estimates, calculates and quantifies said value or worth. What criteria one uses.  The thing is, if we are talking about a person, then that person must have done or achieved something to EARN such a high worth estimation, to have such a high value placed on them through their achievement(s) or action(s), or perhaps talent(s). 

For example, Leonardo Da Vinci is esteemed among the great painters, because in the opinion of many, among the many great painters he is considered the greatest. Likewise such luminaries as Thomas Edison, Sir Isaac Newton, Charles Darwin, Nelson Mandela, Mother Theresa, even two of my own favourites, William Wilberforce and Bob Geldof.

All these people GAVE something to the world at large, something that bestowed a benefit on OTHERS.  What sets them apart from others in relation to the high esteem in which they are held, is that they EARNED that estimation.  The other thing to note is that without exception, they all had human flaws; they were not perfect people, saints in mortal form, just human beings who did something extraordinary FOR others.

Which brings us to this concept of “self-esteem”

Apparently having low “self-esteem” is a bad thing, it means that you don’t place a high enough value on yourself.  You have weighed yourself in the balance, estimated your own worth, and put too low a price on it. In addition, there is no requirement on your part to DO anything, to achieve anything, to bestow some benefit on others – nope – all one has to do is exist.  Your value, your worth comes just from – being.

Analogous to this of course is, that just from being, from existing – one is entitled, by right to hold yourself in “high esteem” no longer is one required to earn this “high esteem” from others, no longer is one required to wait, to hope, to especially, earn from one’s efforts, in whatever sphere, the result, that others will reward one, with a generous gift of “esteem” as a mark of how highly valued those efforts are viewed.

This too is longer a requirement – in fact – according to received wisdom from our favourite experts (feminists) on all things – temporal, spiritual, animal vegetable and mineral – others OWE you a default estimation of HIGH esteem, especially if you are female – if you enter this world with a uterus and ovaries. In fact, it would be no lie to say, that this ONLY applies to women. Men are exempt from having “self-esteem”.

Is it just me or this seem just a tad…………ridiculous? More than a little…………bizarre?

Not too long ago a feeeemale calling herself……”Hot Piece” (I’m not kidding – go look) took issue with  Matt Forney, who wrote a piece entitled The Case Against Female Self-Esteem: September 16, 2013, which garnered 2,459 Comments.

Matt Forney’s article was a tour de force, and the comments were hilarious – though it was really the Censorbot.

To give you an example of the twisted and frankly deluded thinking (though thinking is a bit of a stretch) that some females employ to justify their right to unlimited buckets of unearned “self-esteem” take a look at this. Her opening salvo.

“The world could not survive on masculinity alone. We need people to teach our children. We need people to support a family emotionally, and that’s just not something that men are traditionally good at. Without women to provide that, we’d be living in an angry, emotionally unstable world — NOT that women can’t have high-powered jobs, or that they have to find themselves in traditionally feminine roles, of course. The point is, traditionally masculine and traditionally feminine roles BOTH need to be fulfilled, regardless by whom, or the world couldn’t work.”

I’m guessing you saw what she did there? Shall I translate – women and their awesomeness, and emotionally healthy and sanctified selves, are absolutely crucial to…….the world, because men are ignorant, angry, emotionally unstable barbarians. Women = good, men BAAAAAAAAAAD.  Worship at the feet of the golden uterus you savages.

I should also point out, that she read the Forney article but she didn’t READ it, hence why, in reply to an article entitled The Case Against Female Self-Esteem, she emmmm didn’t actually “get it” Nope, that quote came  close to the start of her “critique” one does have to establish the proper order of things first, after all.

The problem according to feminists is that if women feel bad about themselves this is – well is a bad thingWomen are exempt from “feeling bad about themselves” excluded from having their value or worth as human beings questioned, criticised, held in anything less than high esteem.  Regardless of what they do, say, or cause to be done. Conversely men are exempt from feeling good about THEMselves.

In fact, if something that a woman does actually causes any other person harm, discomfort, pain, anguish or even to suffer injustice, it the fault of THAT person, especially if it is a man – to do otherwise is to cause a loss of self-esteem in a woman, to make her feel bad about herself – and as we know – making a woman feel bad about herself is a crime against humanity of epic proportions, and NOT to be borne.

Feminists also equate self-confidence as the obverse side of the self-esteem coin – if one has confidence in one’s own abilities, regardless of whether or not that confidence is misplaced or patently ridiculous, due to a lack of talent in said abilities – then others are obliged to reward this self-confidence, misplaced or not – with even more buckets of self –esteem top-ups, also shiny gold stars in the form of positions of authority and responsibility, in the form of gifts, large salaries, and in the form of some “extra” benefits to reward this self-confident woman, for sharing this heady mix of vaunting self-confidence and cosmic self-esteem, on others.

Because you see, yet again, the withholding of these things mentioned above might lead to not just a loss of self-esteem, which we know is a BAD THING – for a woman – but might, almost as egregiously shatter her self-confidence, a very very bad thing. For a woman.

Men do not get any gold stars, for anything – to do so would make some woman, somewhere feel bad about herself.

It is NOT TO BE BORNE.  The pinnacle of achievement for a woman, by right, is to feel GOOD about herself, at all times, in all circumstances, and without any regard whatsoever for the consequences upon others, that reaching this pinnacle of feeling GOOD about herself – might cause.

This next quote lays out why women not just have and deserve to have huge self- esteem, but also buckets of self-confidence, because of their innate awesomeness. Though in this instance, “Hot Piece” might just suffer from that “over confidence I talked about earlier.  The essence of the Forney article was that “you ain’t all that and NO, I don’t want to fuck you, just because you’re there. 

“Confidence doesn’t mean that a woman doesn’t have the capacity to feel that her man enhances her life. It just means that she knows she deserves the positive influences he has over her, and that — more importantly — if he were suddenly not to be in her life any more, she could easily find a different man, if not as good, better, to replace him. If that mindset is a turn-off to you, to know that you’re replaceable, that speaks not to her confidence, but to your own insecurity.”

See what I mean, she doesn’t get it, she is confusing, narcissism, self-absorption, selfishness and overweening egotism and vanity with “self-esteem” and “confidence” one of the things that women believe they are entitled to by right, is the unswerving and automatic adoration of men, at all times. Men who do not automatically subscribe to this worldview are crippled by “insecurity” which is a handy way of keeping your “self-esteem” intact and striding out to go shopping for a new man, to replace the one who just left…..because of his “insecurity” till of course, the shelves seem to be bare and new candidates are thin on the ground.  This is then because ALL men are bastards, and you are still awesome.


In a parallel universe populated by persons with the intellectual abilities of sea slugs, and the moral compass of sociopaths THIS would make perfect sense.

Oh. Wait………….damn!

© Anja Eriud 2014